最近 Threads 脆上的海外台灣人超熱鬧。
不是在比哪裡的亞超可以買到義美蛋餅，或者在哪裡吃到接近台灣味的滷肉飯，
而是在比:
誰的居留簽證比較高級。
工作簽看不起學生簽，上述二種瞧不起伴侶簽。
拿伴侶簽的就被默默歸類成「靠愛情吃飯的魯蛇」。
整個圈子像在玩一場「移民版階級遊戲」。
我邊看邊笑，因為我三種簽都拿過 – 學生簽、工作簽、伴侶簽。
那根本不是階級遞進，只是人生階段而已啊。
年輕時在學習，之後瘋狂衝刺事業，現在選擇躺平陪伴。
哪一種不是努力？
現在我拿的就是伴侶居留，因為我根本不需要簽證，我嬌妻就是本地人，怎樣。
然後總會有人酸一句：「喔～所以你靠另一半留下來喔？」
「嗯啊，我能讓一個瑞典人為了我魂縈夢牽，非要我跟著他搬來他家，這樣是不是好棒棒？我台灣之光ㄟ欸。」
那你這樣酸溜溜，是不是因為自己找不到本地人才心理不平衡？
學生簽的以為自己「靠實力」留學，但老實說，大部分靠的是你老北老木的「超能力」。
你以為留下來找工作很簡單？
現實是，在本地雇主眼中，你就是那個「便宜、又不太會要求福利」的乖乖亞洲外勞。
工作簽的覺得自己優越感爆棚，「我出國靠能力拿簽證！」
但你知道你的簽證是綁著公司的吧？
公司一裁人，你馬上就得滾。
能換工作？先去問 HR 願不願意幫你重辦整套手續。
你不是自由人，你是租約附帶的外掛功能。
然後那些酸外配的人更好笑，
「喔～所以你就是靠妳老公才能留在這裡的啊～」
( 一般都是厭女啦，因為台男娶外國女就是爭光，台女跟外國男就是被睡免錢的。)
拜託，那是因為你找不到外國伴侶才在那邊嘴。
要是你有本事被本地人愛上，你也不用靠 LinkedIn 或者脆上面挑起這個話題刷存在。
說白了，這整個簽證鄙視鏈，根本不是在比誰比較努力、比較高級，
是在比誰活得比較焦慮、誰比較會演。
更可笑的是，這場比賽根本沒有盡頭。
因為等你「熬出頭」了，還會有另一場戰場在等：
資深台僑 vs 菜鳥台僑
資深台僑不知道為什麼總覺得自己最厲害，嫌新來的沒見識。
新來的嫌老一輩活在舊世界，成天只會端午中秋農曆年聚餐，每次只會炫耀混血孫輩。
結果兩邊都在同一座異鄉裡，搶著證明誰更「不像外人」。
但說穿了，我們全都一樣。
都在一個不完全屬於自己的國家裡，
努力讓自己有一席之地。
簽證只是張紙，不是榮譽勳章。
真正的差別，不是你拿哪一種簽，而是你有沒有活出那張紙之外的人生。
所以啊，簽證有什麼好比的，多比比腦袋跟耐力吧。
少酸別人，對自己多誠實一點。
因為在這個世界上，沒有人能只靠自己，只是有人比較誠實，有人比較愛演而已。
The Expat Visa Hierarchy: Paper, Pride, and the Petty Olympics
It’s funny how every expat community eventually creates its own class system,
not based on wealth, education, or even language, but on the kind of visa you hold.
In the Taiwanese expat circles I lurk in, there’s a silent but very real pecking order.
Work visas sit on top of the food chain,
student visas try to climb their way up,
and partner visas?
Well, we’re the ones people politely pity over dinner, right before saying,
“Oh, so you’re here because of your partner?”
Yes.
And you’re here because you can’t find a local one to love you.
Simple as that. End of conversation.
The Myth of “Earned Legitimacy”
People love to believe their visa reflects their worth.
Work visa holders brag about being “skilled professionals,” as if HR sponsorship equals divine validation.
But here’s the truth: your visa ties and belongs to your company, not you.
The moment they cut you loose, your “independence” expires with your payroll access.
You’re not a citizen, you’re a subscription.
Then there are the student visas, romanticizing the struggle, posting café laptop photos captioned “building my future.”
But once you graduate, reality hits: you’re not “an international talent.”
You’re cheap labor with better manner.
Employers love your lack of ambition, and your discounted salary.
And the partner visas, my team – we’re the crowd people assume “took the easy route.”
Apparently love disqualifies you from ambition.
But let’s be real:
If you could marry into permanent residency, wouldn’t you?
Don’t hate the player, hate your lack of game.
Same Game, Different Masks
The whole thing reminds me of the movie “Kim Ji-young, Born 1982.”
In that film, working women look down on stay-at-home moms, mother-in-laws look down on their own daughter-in-law.
Everyone just keeps punching downward, hoping someone else ends up lower.
It’s the same with expats.
We all came here trying to belong, but somewhere along the way, “belonging” turned into a competition.
Now we measure worth by paperwork.
Permanent residence equals enlightenment; temporary stay means you’re still “finding yourself.”
It’s absurd, and yet, painfully human.
The Seniority Trap
And just when you think you’ve escaped the visa hierarchy, you discover a new one:
the expat seniority complex.
Old-timers roll their eyes at newcomers,
“Back in my day, rent was half the price and locals were friendlier.”
New arrivals call them bitter and out of touch.
Both sides secretly hate each other, but still meet up once a year for Lunar New Year potluck selfies.
Because nothing bonds immigrants faster than collectively pretending they’re not.
The Paper Illusion
Hard truth: a visa doesn’t make you superior, it just makes you legally tolerated.
It’s not a badge of success, it’s a conditional permission slip.
The real difference isn’t between work, study, or partner visas.
It’s between people who know who they are, and people who only know what they hold.
So the next time you feel tempted to flex your immigration status online,
ask yourself:
Does your visa define you, or expose you?
Because paper can prove where you live, but never who you’ve become.